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This Is How I Breathe 

“To what will you look for help if you will not look to that which is stronger than yourself?” -C.S. Lewis

My life. My faith. The two are closely intertwined. I’ve grown up holding the belief in something greater – I’ll call this thing “Him”. Yet some seasons in my life I have clung to this belief more tightly than other seasons. In this new season of my life, with a 2 month old and a growing toddler, I am reminded daily, if not hourly, how much I depend on my faith. Sure I can survive each day without turning towards this help. But I am not here to just survive. I don’t want to just look after my kids. I want to love them unconditionally and be filled with joy in the process. I want to show them patience so that they will learn it themselves. I want to show kindness so that they can give it in return. I am not here to be a mediocre mom – I want to be a really good one. On my own, though, I am impatient, quick to anger, frustration, boredom, and loneliness. I am so thankful for my busy life of raising two kids, because I am being constantly reminded of my need for help. I am so thankful I don’t need to do it on my own. On my own I’m no good. With Him I am a whole lot better. During those moments when I’ve realized I’ve fallen short in some way, I know the way back. It’s never far away. Because the One I look to for help is always quick to forgive and gently guides me onward.

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