How going out to dinner can save your life.

In my last post I talked about how I often feel trapped as a mom. But when I dwell on this feeling of having no freedom it sucks away my happiness and zest for life. And since I can’t just quit my role as a nursing mom to gain the freedom I desire, I have to work around the obstacles in my life. Or, better yet, make them work for me. 

My husband and I don’t often go out to a restaurant with both kids in tow. However, we were recently invited out last minute on a weeknight, and since I was only planning on reheating leftovers for dinner I didn’t have anything stopping me from saying yes. I went back and forth between wanting to go and not wanting to deal with the hassle of it all. Driving in rush hour traffic with both kids, trying to be home for bedtime, waking up the napping baby, and so on. But we did go and I’m happy we did. I got to enjoy adult conversation and felt energized by the experience.

Going out to dinner, as simple as it was, was a spontaneous act out of the ordinary that gave me a taste of the freedom I had before having kids. I realized how crucial these novel experiences are to my own happiness. Since most of my time is spent being a mom, I need to create these experiences within this role. 

I will be more quick to say yes to these dinner invitations in the future, I’ll take a new route when going for a walk instead of my regular path, I’ll take my toddler to the playground instead of washing the dishes, I’ll drive the long way home from a play date so I can treat myself to a latte and listen to the radio. I’ll start a new book. And always make time to write. 

Too many people miss the silver-lining because they’re expecting gold. 

-Maurice Setter


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