She dances across the horizon
Everything she touches turns to beauty
She weaves her story in threads of pink, orange,
And flaming red
The sky, her lover, becomes wrapped in her
Melts into her
How quickly and silently she slips away
And I am left to wonder
Was it all just a dream?
This summer was full of delicious moments. I had time to really slow down. To visit the beach in solitude, to walk along the sand and watch the waves ebb and flow. To sit on my deck and read and write and dream. To dance with the butterflies. My soul was nourished in the stillness I found. My heart was renewed.
Now September is in full swing, with new routines and schedules bringing with them fuller, busier days. And I am finding myself longing for those quiet, dreamy days of summer. When I walked beside wild roses swarmed with bees, and golden rods stretching high, and heard Heaven calling. Love calling. Home calling.
I am excited for the things that September has brought with her, the people I will meet along the way, the things I will learn and the joy that will be wrapped up in all of this.
But I tasted something this summer that has only wet my appetite for more. More stillness. More listening. More seeking. The beauty that I found on the beaches, the insights that came during long car rides, the ways in which my faith was strengthened, I want more of this. I need more of this.
I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to turn my face, or my heart. I found something that I was meant to chase after, and I don’t want to let go.
But there is always the pulling of the world on me. The constantly growing list of e-mails to write, groceries to replenish, events to plan and attend. My life is always changing, one week slides into the next. A month ago is already a mystery to me. Who I was, what my days looked like, has already started to shift.
How do I hold onto the promises, the beauty, the moments that have left me absolutely breathless, when they disappear so quickly infront of me? When moments of stillness and quiet are quickly crashed in upon, drowned out, with noise. How do I keep hold of what is important to me without being pushed along by the force of the rest of the world?
I don’t want the longing in me to fall silent, I don’t want to grow deaf to the song rising from my heart. But busyness and packed calendars distract me from the deepness in me, the longing in me. The soul in me. Even when everything I am making time for is good and well, it’s easy to forget where I have been. It’s easy to forget what I have seen in the slower moments. What I want is for the truth that I have begun to uncover to be continually shaping me and guiding me.
I want to be like the ocean, though its surface may be a busy, loud storm of waves, underneath it is deep, calm, steady. These are the questions I will be searching to answer.